A lot of times, when I see a complete stranger do something I do not really agree with I would just observe them and try to learn from what I see. On a semi-drizzling (or super foggy depending on terminology) day, I parked near a high school to finish eating before heading out to class. The next thing I know, a car pulls up next to the one I was in, and bumps into my car while getting out. I looked up, and saw that her body bumped into my car, but she did not seem to notice because she was busy yelling at the person who drove her to school. Watching that scene unfold in front of me like that, I realized how lucky I was in high school when I was able to get rides home. At first, I could not believe that someone would be yelling at the driver like that, especially when the driver probably had to
change their own schedule to drive her to school. Even though I did not get out of the car to approach her, I took note of how bad of an impression she left on me. There were times during high school when I was able to get a ride to my destination through family and friends, especially when it was raining. While I did not yell at them for the ride they gave me, I know that there were times when I forgot to thank them for helping me after a few rides. Through this scene, I realized how nice it would be for the person helping, if I thank them for helping me. Personally, I do not really yell at people (I may rant, but never really yell… yet) so I do not think I have to worry about me yelling at people, but there were times when I got a ride from someone, and just got out of the car when we got to the destination. From watching the way strangers act, I take notes on what I should or should not do in different situation. I know that there are times when I might act in a similar way to the people I observe, but I hope that the mental image of how it looks to an outsider will keep me from repeating their actions.
That is different from what I would do when it is a coworker or a friend (who is more like a casual friend). With the people I work with, I try to pay attention to my own obligations before really commenting on what other people do (at least at work). A few years ago, I ran into an elementary school classmate who was volunteering at a facility that I was interested in helping out in. She started telling me about which positions I should go for, because it is ‘easy’. There are some positions that would give volunteers more time to surf the internet and such while volunteering. She really liked the department she was volunteering in, because she was dealing with one child at a time, and more volunteers were allotted for the job than was needed. I listened while she was telling me about her experience in the different departments, nodded my head, and thanked her. After thinking about what she told me, and the way her life is, I realized that she was using the volunteering opportunity to relax and distress. When volunteering, or offering my help to people, I like to feel productive. So when I was ranking which departments I want to work with, I made sure to rank my friend’s suggestions last.
In general, I want to try to keep an objective perspective when doing things (when possible). That seemed like a good idea in the beginning, but later I realized how hard it is to actually follow through with that idea. I remember a saying someone told me that states something similar to: use the standard you use apply onto others (when looking for faults) on yourself, and use the standard you use for forgive yourself to forgive others. Keeping that saying in mind, I found that it was easier for me to remember that other people have their own reasons for doing things the way they do. It is through the combination of different perspectives that new ideas are developed. This semester, I was able to see how different ideas and perspectives can be combined into a better representation of a situation as a while.
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Your blog seems kind of unclear (jumpy) to me but I did understand parts of your blog. Maybe try to stick to one experience and evaluate more off of that. Explain more briefly what the moral to your experience was. Try proofreading your blog once more. Other than that, I can agree with you as well about when to agree or disagree on someones beliefs. It is definitely hard to relate to someone else's beliefs, especially when you don't know them and they give you an advice or when they tell you something they enjoy and try to share it with you thinking you'll enjoy it too. Because everyone is different and believes in different things. I think it's easier to go along with a family or a close friends belief because there is more trust between the relationship. As for disapproving someones actions, it's hard to approve most of the time because we were all raised differently but we learn to let it be because if we all went by one rule, we would never know what is right and wrong. It's like learning from your mistakes and knowing not to do it again but instead you prevent yourself from doing wrong by seeing others do it first and applying it to yourself.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree on the statement: "Use the standard you use apply onto others (when looking for faults) on yourself, and use the standard you use for forgive yourself to forgive others." It is always a good idea to put yourself in someone else's perspective because you are able to learn their ways of doing and believing things. Putting yourself in someone else's point of view benefits you by being more open and accepting to things in life. But it's good that you are open to others and prioritize your beliefs.